Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Waking up on the wrong side of the bed

Okay, I've had one of THOSE days. You know the kind. You wake up and just feel grumpy. After days and days of sunshine in Oregon, it's gone and done it's raining. Now, having lived here for 27 years you'd think I'd be used to spring in Oregon. But I woke up today and was just downright angry at the rain. My son asked me at the breakfast table, "Why are you making the mad face mama?" And I said, "Because of the stinking rain." I told him that I was just joking and in fact, the "mad face" was just because I didn't want to get out of bed this morning. I wasn't mad, just tired. He went back to eating his banana and said, "Cheer up mama. God made us a good day. It's light outside." Oh, he is my joy. Three years old and so wise. At least I don't live in Alaska and have to deal with intense periods of darkness. :)

All that said, today ended up being one of those days that I just have to admit that life is hard. I fail. I can't do it on my own. It's humbling to have to apologize to my son that my attitude is just downright rotten. It's humbling to realize how selfish and self-centered I truly am. But grace is here again. At this point in my life, I'm just sorting through a lot of junk in my life. I'm taking the skeletons out of the closet. I'm becoming vulnerable. I'm taking a deep look at who I am and trying to change the things that need changing. I know that God loves me and I know that He desires my greatest good. I trust in Him with all my heart and lean not on my own understanding (because scriptures commands that I do so). Life wouldn't be worth living without Christ. At the end of my day I can lean on the words of this great hymn. I love it. I love it. I love it. It was written by the great John Newton (1725-1807) and is entitled "Let Us Love and Sing and Wonder".

Let us love and sing and wonder,
Let us praise the Savior’s Name!
He has hushed the law’s loud thunder,
He has quenched Mount Sinai’s flame.
He has washed us with His blood,
He has brought us nigh to God.

Let us love the Lord Who bought us,
Pitied us when enemies,
Called us by His grace, and taught us,
Gave us ears and gave us eyes:
He has washed us with His blood,
He presents our souls to God.

Let us sing, though fierce temptation
Threaten hard to bear us down!
For the Lord, our strong Salvation,
Holds in view the conqueror’s crown:
He Who washed us with His blood
Soon will bring us home to God.

Let us wonder; grace and justice
Join and point to mercy’s store;
When through grace in Christ our trust is,
Justice smiles and asks no more:
He Who washed us with His blood
Has secured our way to God.

Let us praise, and join the chorus
Of the saints enthroned on high;
Here they trusted Him before us,
Now their praises fill the sky:
“Thou hast washed us with Your blood;
Thou art worthy, Lamb of God!”

Hark! the Name of Jesus, sounded
Loud, from golden harps above!
Lord, we blush, and are confounded,
Faint our praises, cold our love!
Wash our souls and songs with blood,
For by Thee we come to God.

Sing out a new song.



Post a Comment

<< Home